whole day staying at home doing nth but only thinking of one person. she really kills lotsa my brain cells. not only missing her, i hope i had saved a frdship of mine ytd, sorry for everything.
now i'm alone in my house doing nth but thinking of her, i hope to kick her out of my mind but its difficult. mayb a crush or love, i still dont know yet, my life is messy when i'm having my holidays. perhaps its the only reason i can find to love my attachment, have no time to think of anybody but jus my patients.
wat so special abt her?i really dont know, i dont really know her well and long enough. love is nth but jus a trouble and burden to me. messing up my life everytime, especially tis holiday. i wish i can change myself into another person but no matter how i try, its the old shell of me tat changed but not my personality and emotions.
i need a brainwash!!!urgently, but there is sth i would like to rmb. my close frds, my family, my loves 1 and my buddy. the rest of it only make me troubled and killing me everytime i think. i m not single yet i m lonely, sound funny?yeah, tats life wat can i do? whoever i find or crush on is not suitable for me, mayb my taste has gone higher till i cant reach or i jus let my feelings run wild tat me unable catch and control it. i m sure a failure, cant succeed in anything but gd in studies only. wat's the use of tat? my social life and everything is such amess u.
i dont wish to talk abt it anymore, i m hrtbroken and sad now.haiz
okie, i went out to cwp pool center cos jas ask me to go and play pool. en, andy, carol and jas was there when i reached, at first i observe them playing till quite awhile i played wif carol. jas gotta go for her training and andy need to go for a party. left only en, carol and me, this carol ar, took a pic of herself when i was playing wif en. puke, haha, no lah. after all the playing till ard 6plus, we went to craft as en wanna pierce her tragus, she is kinda scare but she still pierce it. haha, her expression was so funny, i went to take before and after piercing. after tat i went to meet my family to have our dinner then. nice day!!
